if you give mommy a cookie....

by Julie Tilsner

If you give a mom a cookie,

She's going to want a latte to go with it.

But before she gets a latte, she has to find her toddler's pink ladybug boots.

To find the ladybug boots, she has to venture into the playroom.

When she tries to straighten up the playroom, she finds Daddy's left shoe, the salad bowl, and an open package of graham crackers. She also finds her cell phone.

So she'll yell at her toddler about the cell phone and wake up the baby from his morning nap.

But if she goes in to pick up the baby, the cell phone will ring.

When she answer, it'll be the doctor's office reminding her that she had an appointment this morning and would she like to reschedule, say, sometime in November?

While she's trying to mentally re-create her calendar, the baby will start to cry.

Then her toddler will run to see what's the matter and find the graham crackers.

When she finds the graham crackers, there'll be crumbs all over the playroom.

So the mom will get the broom from the hall closet and notice that Daddy forgot to buy diapers last night, as she asked.

But she will find her toddler's pink ladybug boots.

And when she finds the pink ladybug boots, she'll remember her emergency stash of diapers in the car.

So she'll wrestle her toddler and her baby into their car seats and drive to the store to buy more diapers and more milk.

While she's buying milk, she'll remember that she wanted that latte.

And if she manages to order her latte without a tantrum or poop episode from either of her kids…

Then she's going to need another cookie!